Setting Boundaries When Dating a Human

We covered some ground rules for if a human wants to date a vampire, but what about the other way around?  Suppose we’ve got a decent, heroic guy who just happens to be one of the undead?  Just because he drinks blood doesn’t mean he can’t have standards.

1. Don’t ask me to bite you.  I know you’ve read all those paranormal romance books where biting and sex equals the greatest experience on the planet, but trust me, it can get messy.

2. No role-playing.  You’re not Buffy, and I don’t want to see a stake hidden under your pillow.

3. Don’t try to have important conversations or talk me into stuff around dawn when I’m too tried to properly listen.

4. If you’re mad at me, don’t throw my bags of blood down the sink.  That stuff is hard to come by!

5.  I can’t introduce you to Edward, so don’t ask.

What would you add to the list?

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20 comments on “Setting Boundaries When Dating a Human

  1. I can’t introduce you to Edward, so don’t ask. That’s hilarious!

    I think I’d add, If we have a child, we will not name her Claudia.

    Great list, Angela.

  2. Susan says:

    No eating garlic before our date, and if you want to have a playful waterfight using water pistols? Holy water not allowed!

  3. Jen Kirchner says:

    LOL I think #5 is my favorite. Terrific list, Angela!

  4. Ha! Funny, Angela. Thanks for the laugh! 🙂

  5. T. F. Walsh says:

    Too funny.. I like them all. Maybe not to ask to meet the vamp’s parents…:)

  6. Susan A. says:

    They are all cute. Maybe add:

    -No playing “hide the coffin” while I’m asleep so I have no idea where I am at sunset!

  7. ROFL…love it Angela!

  8. How about, “I don’t tan so don’t ask me to go to the beach.”
    Fun list Angela! LOL

  9. Elena Aitken says:

    Awesome! Love it!

  10. EllieAnn says:

    #3 — haha! That’s my favorite. Funny post!

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